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ďAnd Iím proud to be an American, where at least I know Iím free. And I wonít forget the men who died, who gave that right to me.Ē
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  Volume No. 12 Issue No. 5 May 2015  

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Monkey Business
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   If you canít drive it, donít steal it
   A robber hailed a cab shortly before 5 a.m. in San Franciscoís Richmond District last week. He asked the driver to take him through Golden Gate Park, where he robbed the cab driver and told him to get out of the car Ė and walk away. But the robber had to call the driver back when he couldnít figure out how to operate the Hybrid cab. Now get this: The cabbie told the robber the car was already running and he could just drive away. The robber told the cabbie to walk away again; he ran and called the police. When the cops arrived, the robber was nowhere in sight and the cab was still running!
   
   An easy arrest
   A 22-year-old from West Lafayette, Ind., has a few drinks and decides to go for a drive. He gets sleepy and then decides to find a place to take a nap. He pulls into a parking lot and goes to sleep, with the engine running. But thatís not the punch line Ė he lives, only to realize heís napping in the police headquarters parking lot. Momma told me not to drive drunk and park in police lots.
   
   Caskets for Halloween
   A Minnesota coffin shop owner is holding a Halloween sale: full-size coffins for $100. Mike Zoff of Affordable Coffins & Artery in St. Paul makes the wooden coffins in his garage. The business has been so profitable he quit his real estate broker job to sell coffins full-time. Zoff said the coffins are popular as coffee tables, book shelves or holiday decorations Ė or as Halloween props, or flower boxes, or toy boxes Ė franchise on the way?


 
  

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